The irrational fear

Posted 10 March 2014 - 01:57 PM One of my most uncomfortable moments when I began this journey was 'giving up' my socializing time with my friends before and after my 12 step meeting. I became convinced that ALL alcoholics are smokers, they would all be puffing away before the meeting and I'd miss all the good conversation, and they would all be puffing away after the meeting and I'd have to rush through the cloud of smoke, holding my breath, hop in my car and drive home, lonely and miserable. So, its been 6 weeks. Last night, I attended my 'home group'.......and after the meeting I stood with the smokers, chatting. Not once did it cross my mind that I would like to smoke with them. In fact, it looked stupid......these people putting these rolled up pieces of paper/tobacco/chemicals into their mouths and inhaling it into their lungs. I didn't feel jealous, anxious, judgemental, I just felt.....apathetic. I felt nothing. Weird. That my biggest fear was that I'd never be able to stand with my friends again, and there I was.....chatting and being a non-smoker. I don't smoke. Posted Image And the before the meeting time....? It turns out that ALL alcoholics don't smoke. There are plenty of people sitting inside, waiting for the meeting to begin, having perfectly good conversations without a cigarette dangling from their lips. Go figure.